


Getting to Know You

by NerdKenz2001



Category: The Hobbit (Jackson Movies), The Hobbit - All Media Types, The Hobbit - J. R. R. Tolkien
Genre: Alternate Universe - Erebor Never Fell, BAMF Bilbo Baggins, Baby Dwarves, Bilbo is So Done, Confused Dwarves, Dwarf Culture & Customs, Dwarves in the Shire, Eventual Bilbo Baggins/Thorin Oakenshield, King Thorin, M/M, Overprotective Dwarves, Overprotective Thorin, Poor Bilbo, Protective Thorin, Sassy Bilbo Baggins, Thorin Is an Idiot, Thorin is a Softie, Young Bilbo Baggins, Young Thorin Oakenshield
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-03-18
Updated: 2020-12-27
Packaged: 2021-02-28 21:40:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,672
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23204089
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NerdKenz2001/pseuds/NerdKenz2001
Summary: Bilbo finds two dwarfling boys at his front of the door and takes them in. He expected two scared little children who will soon be claimed by kin. He did NOT expect a bunch of dwarves basically accusing him of kidnapping babes.Oh, should I mention that it also includes a King?
Relationships: Bilbo Baggins & Fíli, Bilbo Baggins & Fíli & Kíli, Bilbo Baggins & Thorin's Company, Bilbo Baggins/Thorin Oakenshield
Comments: 42
Kudos: 574





	1. Chapter 1

Bilbo wasn’t expecting to hear a knock at his door halfway through supper. Normally if he had guests, they would make themselves known beforehand via a letter. It’s quite rude when someone knocked on someone’s door without prior notice, but nevertheless, Bilbo was raised right by his parents.

The bachelor Hobbit quickly tied his robe and walked over to the door in order to open it. At first, Bilbo did not see anyone and was about to close it again, when a voice rang out to break the silence. “H-hello…?”

Bilbo looked down and his eyes widened when he saw two children, one was blond and looked no older than a toddler while the other one was brunette and just a babe. Bilbo leaned down to get a better look at the children. They were both covered in dirt with a few scratches on the older one, but that didn’t surprise him. What surprised him was that the blond has a few patches of facial hair! Dwarves! What would such young ones be doing in the Shire?

“Hello young ones.” Bilbo smiled at them and the blond gave him a watery smile in return. “What are you doing all the way out here…?”

“O-our  _ amad  _ was attacked on our way back to  _ Irak’Adad _ ..,” he whispered. Bilbo gasped in shock. Attacked? Who would attack a mom and her babes? And Irak’Adad…? The older Hobbit has never heard of such a place before in Arda.

“Is there no one else for you to head to?” The child shook his head while his young brother babbled in his arms.

“All the others closed their doors in front of our faces.” It took all of Bilbo’s strength to keep his outward appearance calm so that he wouldn't scare the little ones. How could anyone just slam their door in children’s faces? Was it because they were dwarves? 

“Well, you two can come inside. I have some supper left and I think you two need a good meal.” The blond’s eyes lit up and quickly entered Bag End while carrying his brother. He sat the two down at the table and made them large plates since they were nothing by bones in Bilbo’s eyes. “Oh! I totally forgot! My name is Bilbo Baggins. What are your names and can he eat solids?”

“I’m Fili and this,” Fili said as he waved his brother's arm. “Is Kili. He can eat soft food but harder foods like meat he can’t. He doesn’t have any teeth yet.”

“Well, I can feed him some mashed potatoes then. Isn’t a true Hobbit meal without any potatoes.” Fili just nodded as he handed over his little brother. Kili just babbled at Bilbo as the older Hobbit gently fed the babe some mashed potatoes from a spoon. 

“This is yummy!” Fili shouted and shoveled more food into his mouth. Bilbo could let this display of no manners slide since he was hungry. 

“I’m glad.” Bilbo smiled and scooped up the mashed potatoes that dibbled out of Kili’s mouth. “You’ll need a bath. “I think I still have some clothes that can fit both of you.”

Fili groaned like he was in pain. “I don’t like baths! Dwalin says that a real dwarf doesn’t need a bath like an elf!”

Bilbo just raised an eyebrow at the boy. “Well, then this ‘Dwalin’ must stink really bad. If he wants to be covered in dirt like the vegetables in my garden then he can be with the vegetables, and…” Bilbo leaned over to look at the boy. “Elves like vegetables…”

Fili gasped. “But amad said that we need to eat vegetables then we will grow big and strong!”

“That is true, however Elves like to be covered in vegetable dirt.”

Fili nodded frantically. He didn’t want to be an elf! Uncle said that Elves are no good! “Okay Master Baggins! I’ll take a bath!”

Bilbo nodded approvingly. He guided the young dwarf towards his bathroom and helped him out of his clothes. He told the young dwarf that he will be back with new clothes and will start the bath. Fili nodded and just sat on the bathroom floor, naked as the day he was born, and waited for the older Hobbit.

Bilbo found some baby clothes and clothes for Fili that his mom had kept. He also found a basket big enough to put Kili in while he bathed the blond. He put some blankets in it and gently placed the now sleeping Kili in it. Bilbo carried Kili to the bathroom and laughed softly when he saw Fili still sitting where he left him. “Ready?”

“Yep!” Fili shot up and stood next to Bilbo as the water poured into the tub. Once the tub was decently filled for a dirty dwarfling, he picked up him and gently placed him in the tub.

“Sorry I don’t have any toys for you to play with, but I think you would like to get clean then get to bed.”

Fili groaned about how he wasn't tired but then he let out a loud yawn. Bilbo just raised an eyebrow and the young child just smiles sheepishly. The red-headed creature just shook his head and started to wash the dirt off the child, which was a LOT of dirt. He asked how long they were in the wild and Fili gave a look like he was thinking. 

“Umm...four days…?”

“Four days! My goodness, you must be really brave.” The blond dwarfling nodded in agreement.

“My amad says that I get it from our family! That our family is as strong as stone!”

“Wow! As strong as stone? That must mean that your family is very strong….” Bilbo hummed as he poured water over Fili’s soup covered hair. Fili nodded as he slowly closed his eyes and leaned into the Hobbit’s hands. 

Once Bilbo was done with bathing both of the dwarflings, he dried them and put them into their new clothes. When he was done he laughed at Fili because his hair poofed up and made him look like a dandelion. A sleepy dandelion, but a dandelion nonetheless. “I’ll think I’ll call you Little Lion.”

“Why?” Fili yawned as they walked to the guest bedroom.

“You remind me of a dandelion. A little dandelion.” Fili pouted at Bilbo.

“But that sounds like something elves would name each other!”

“Yes, but I shorted it. Therefore, you are Little Lion.” Fili pouted for a bit more before admitting that the nickname was much tougher sounding than Little Dandelion. “Good, now, go to bed. I’ll cook you and your brother a big breakfast tomorrow morning. Then a second breakfast and Elevenses and then-“

“How many meals do you have?” Fili asked in awe. 

“Seven for an adult Hobbit while little ones normally have six since they are still growing.” Bilbo tickled Fili’s sides and he laughed. 

“Then we‘ll be as big as Bombur!”

“Bombur?”

“Bombur! He’s Bofur’s brother and cousin to Bifur! Bifur has an ax in his head and looks scary at first, but he can make awesome toys! He made me a Dragon!”

“A dragon you say? Is it a scary dragon?” Bilbo stroked the blond’s hair while Fili was trying to fight off sleep. 

“No...but the dragon in Irak’Adad’s stories is scary though…” And with that, the blond fell asleep while Bilbo quietly left the two sleeping dwarflings alone. Questions were running rampid in his mind. Is Irak’Adad a person or a place? 

Bilbo quickly took out his map of Arda and looked at the entire west side of the map and never saw a place called Irak’Adad. The closest Dwarf settlement he could think of was the Blue Mountains, which is at  _ least  _ a two mouths journey to the Shire. 

“Oh dear.” Bilbo sighed and quickly took out a piece of paper and something to write with. Hopefully someone in the Blue Mountains would know who Fili and Kili are and if they have any family, and if not… well he wouldn’t mind taking in two dwarflings. 

**_To whom it may concern,_ **

**_I am Bilbo Baggins of the Shire and I have come into contact with two dwarflings named Fili and Kili. They have informed me that they were attacked on their way to Irak’Adad. Since I am not of the same race as the young ones, I have no idea if Irak’Adad is a person or a place._ **

**_Sincerely, Bilbo Baggins of Bag End._ **

He would send the letter in the morning once he woke up. For now, he will clean up the dishes and go to bed. 

* * *

Thorin had to control his outburst of emotions when Balin told him that they had found Dis dead from an Orc Blade and that his only remaining kin were missing. Young Fili and Kili, a mere child and babe, were gone. Most likely taken by Orcs.

Once he was alone, he broke down in tears. He lost them. He lost them all.

And those  _ Kakhuf inbarathrag  _ will suffer in the greatest ways, and by his hand. They will suffer by HIS hand. He promises that on the grave of his forefathers. 

“Thorin?” A voice called out from behind him. The Dwarven King turned around and saw his friend, Dwalin, looking remorseful. “Are ye aight?”

“I just lost my kin by Orcs,” Thorn spat. “How do you think I’m doing.”

“Ye weren’t the only one who lost them,” Dwalin grunted. “I cared for Dis and her boys as well.”

“If only I had gone with them! If only we hadn't needed to visit the Blue Mountains! If only I hadn’t set out before them!” Thorin roared as he punched a whole in the wall. 

“Ye couldn’t ‘ave known! Ye couldn’t ‘ave known,” Dwalin replied as he grasped his friend into his arms. “Ye couldn’t ‘ave known.”

* * *

Bilbo woke up to the feeling of little pudgy fingers poking his face. He groaned in response and rolled over to his side while pulling the covers with him. 

Fili giggled at the silly Hobbit and went to the other side of the bed. “Mister Baggins! Kili is crying and he stinks!”

“Coming...I'm Coming…” Bilbo mumbled and slowly got up. He looked outside and noticed it was about midnight, and realized that he didn’t have any diapers for the babe. He cursed silent and told Fili that he would be right back and not to go anywhere.

Bilbo quickly put on a robe and went over next door to the Gamgee’s. After a few moments of knocking, Hamfast finally opened the door. “Bilbo…? What are you doing here…?” 

“Do you have any spare diapers? I recently took in a dwarf babe,” Bilbo explained hastily. Hamfast stared at him as if he was still waking up before nodding. He disappeared for a few moments before he returned with a couple of diapers.

“‘Ere you go Mister Bilbo.” Bilbo thanked him and returned to Bag End. 

“I’m back!” Bilbo called and hurried towards the room he had lodged the two. When he opened the door the smell hit him like a runaway pony. Why are babes so damn smelly? He is so thankful that he never married now. 

“Kili stinks!” Fili called out from beside Kili. 

“I know,” Bilbo sighed and went to change Kili’s diaper. He was glad that he had helped change his younger cousin’s children when they needed it. It wasn’t a pleasant experience but it had to be done. The sooner one does it then the sooner it gets done.

“Irak’Adad doesn’t like changing Kili either. He usually makes Mister Dwalin do it.” Fili commented. “It’s funny because Mister Dwalin makes the funniest faces when he changes Kili’s diapers. Like this!”

Fili made a grumpy face that turned into a grumpy and disgusted face at the same time. “Yeah, Mister Dwalin can fight many orcs and goblins but Mister Balin said that when it comes to stinky dwarflings then he will gag.”

“They sound fun.”

“They are…” Fili whispered as he looked at his now sleeping brother. “They are fun…”


	2. Chapter 2

Bilbo yawned as he fried up some bacon on the stove. He had only gotten a few hours of sleep due to Kili’s constantly waking up throughout the night. First it was to change his diaper, then he had to feed the babe, and the final time he was just lonely. How his cousins can have so many babes is an enigma to him.

He had already finished making biscuits and gravy, sausages, eggs, bacon, and pancakes. Sure, it was a light breakfast but they are young so he has to be considerate. If they want more then he can make a bigger second breakfast. He does have some ingredients for hash browns and probably some mushrooms.

”Bilbo...?” Fili yawned while rubbing his eyes. “Is breakfast ready yet...?”

”Just about!” Bilbo replied with cheer. “Do you think you can get Kili for me?”

Fili nodded enthusiastically. He ran as fast as his little legs could carry him and opened the door that led to the room that Bilbo gave them to sleep in. He was excited to eat the food that Bilbo prepared for them and can’t wait to go with Bilbo to the market with Kili.

The young blond walked up next to his sleeping brother and poked at his cheek.”Wake uppppppp. Wake up Kili.”

”Fee!” The small child squealed when Fili started to tickle him. 

“Let’s go eat. Then we’ll go to the market with Bilbo!” Kíli squealed happily when his big brother picked him up and walked down the hallway. “I wonder what we’ll see. Do you think the market is like the market Uncle Thorin and amad take us to?”

”Bah!” Fili smiled and put him down in a newly acquired high chair in the kitchen. 

“I got him!” 

“Thank you,” Bilbo said as he made plates for the two dwarflings. He gave Fili some biscuits and gravy, sausage, bacon, eggs, and pancakes while he gave Kili some foods that didn’t require teeth to eat. “If you want more just ask. I know it’s not that big but I’ll make a bigger second breakfast if you want.”

”second breakfast?” Fili asked in shock.

”Yes, don’t you dwarves have second breakfast?”

”Dwarves only have three meals!” Bilbo gasped in shock. Three meals? That’s practically starving to a Hobbit. Those poor babies! No wonder they are so small!

Bilbo shoveled more food onto Fili’s plate. “Eat up darling! You need to put some meat on your bones!”

Fili just looked at the mountain of food on his plate. Normally, he would only have this amount of food during Durin’s Day! This amount of food for breakfast? Bilbo must be rich if he considers this small! He quickly thanked Bilbo for the food and dug in.

* * *

Thorin threw himself into his work in order to deal with the death of his sister (and most likely the death of his sister-sons). Balin tried to get him to stop, saying it wasn’t healthy or him to push away his feelings. He can’t publicly grieve for them. He can’t show his subjects his emotions or they’ll think him weak-

“Thorin!” Both Dwalin and Balin came rushing in with a letter in Balin’s hand. “We have news! It’s about your nephews!”

”Did...did they find the bodies...?” Thorin’s heart started to clench. His nephews, the two boys who he thought as his own, are _dead._ Their short lives-

“They are alive.” Thorin’s mind froze. They...They were alive?

Thorin shot up from his seat and snapped to face his long time friends. He asked them where his sister-sons were. If they were hurt. If they were being taken care of. He stopped asking questions once Balin looked at his with remorse. “It seems...that they were taken in by a halfling.”

”A halfling?! Aren’t they the ones who bury lost children in their gardens once they aren’t claimed in enough time?!” Balin nodded and handed him the letter. Thorin snatched it from the grip of the older dwarf and scanned the letter. “This Bilbo Baggins will pay for every holding my nephews hostage!”

”Should we bring an army?” Dwalin grunted with his arms crossed across his chest. “I can gather a few men.”

”An army is not necessary, but bring a few men.” Dwalin nodded and left in order to get a few dwarves to march to The Shire. 

“You could create a war with The Shire!” Balin exclaimed at his king. “Thorin, you must think this through!”

”They took my nephews! I bet they also killed Dis! They must pay for that!”

* * *

Bilbo sighed as he watched Fili run around the market. He was popping up at random stalls and asking Bilbo what some things were. Bilbo, who was used to a child's hyperactive mind due babysitting his many cousins, calmly answered each of the young dwarf's questions. The younger dwarf's brother was sleeping in the sling that Bilbo was carrying him in. Kili was a little fussy at the moment but he calmed down as soon as he saw his big brother happily running around the market. 

_'Are all dwarves this clingy to each other? Or is it because they are young boys?'_ Bilbo thought as he smiled as he notice Fili start talking to a young hobbitling. The young hobbit was a little startled at the easily excitable dwarfling but laughed at the jokes Fili told him. It's nice that the young blond was making friends. However, as much as he would like to let his young charge to continue to play with his new friend, he needs to put these groceries away. It is almost time for Afternoon Tea.

"Fili," Bilbo called. "It's time to return. I have to start getting ready for Afternoon tea."

All of the older Hobbits nodded approvingly at the mention of Bilbo getting ready for the meal.

"Coming!" The redheaded Hobbit chuckled softly as he watch the child run on his stubby legs that reminded him of a young deer running for the first time. He loved children, but he never truly found someone who could interest him for him to even think about marriage. Many have tried to catch his eye, yet many have also failed. His cousin, Primula, jokes that that only person who could catch Bilbo's eye would be a prince. He snorted at that. Him? Marrying a prince? Yeah right.

As the trio made their way to Bag End, Bilbo noticed a crow sitting on top of his mailbox. Fili, seeming to recognize it, gasped in excitement. "That's uncle's crow! Uncle got your letter!"

"Well, let's see what he says then." Bilbo grasped the letter in his fingers, but before he could grab it, the crow snipped at his fingers. Kili woke up suddenly at the sudden jerk of his carrier and looked up at Bilbo. The older Hobbit held back a curse since he was in the presence of children and he was in public. Doing such things were unbecoming of an adult after all. 

Fili frowned at the crow before turning his head back to his finder. "I'm sorry, Bilbo! Normally uncle's crow never bites anyone!"

"It's okay, young one," Bilbo reassured. "I am a stranger after all. It's only right for the animal to be cautious."

That seemed to make the dwarfling feel better as he begged Bilbo to open it. He wanted to know what his uncle said and when he would come get them. He wanted to tell Kili, but his little brother was still asleep in the sling that was around Bilbo's shoulders. Bilbo laughed at him and told him that they will read the letter once they put the food away. Can't have it go bad while they were waiting around. 

"Okay!" Fili ran through the round door of Bag End and grabbed the bag of groceries from the younger creature. He might not have put them in the correct places, but who needed three pantries? Not even his uncle had three full pantries of food, and he is a prince! Well, technically a king since they don't know what happened to amad's adad.

"Come on Bilbo!" He whined as he pulled on the Hobbit's sleeve. His caretaker chuckled and followed the young dwarf to the living room so he could read the letter. 

"Alright," Bilbo said as he sat down in his comfy armchair and pulled Fili on top of his lap. He let the boy open the note and sat excitedly as Bilbo started to read the letter to the dwarflings.

_**"Halfling, you will deliver my sister-sons right now or I will remove your blasted head from your shoulders. If any harm as come to my sister-sons then not only will I burn down your blasted Shire but I will make sure that you are made an example that such insolence is not tolerate by the House of Durin.** _

_**Thorin Oakenshield, son of Thrain, son of Thror."** _

Bilbo's eyes widen and snuck a glance at the blond. Fili was staring at the letter in shock and he kept opening and closing his mouth as his mind tried to find the words. Kili, who didn't understand the words, just started to whine at the tense atmosphere that developed. "Fee!"

"Uncle...That's not uncle!" Fili cried as tears started to form in his eyes. "Uncle would never hurt anyone that aren't orcs! That's not him!"

"Are you sure?"

"Uncle would never burn down the Shire!" Bilbo nodded and maneuvered himself around the children so that they would sit in his armchair and he would go and write a letter to their "uncle". If Fili is sure that whoever wrote the letter is not their uncle then he would gladly tell the man that he would not hand over the two children over to a man who would burn down a peaceful society. Not on his watch.

But he will have to inform the Thain. He would know what to do.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *come in 9 months late with a starbucks in hand*

**Author's Note:**

> Hi! Should I be working on Of Dwobbits and Elves? Prob.
> 
> Personal Discord: https://discord.gg/hkUPneP
> 
> Middle Earth Discord: https://discord.gg/ghYtFv9
> 
> Ko-Fi: ko-fi.com/nerdkenz


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